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You know it’s bad when The Crawfish can tell on Wednesday morning that he’ll have enough material this week for a special Saturday Edition of The Weekly Claw.  Yep, by 0950 on Wednesday, my blood pressure was already sky high and my Word document was already over 3 pages in length. 

The United Auto Workers have run the Big 3 into the ground with their labor costs, which are FAR above what other auto manufacturing companies in the US incur.  Do you realize what kind of benefits these guys get?  They are paid a LOT more than military folks, get 6-7 weeks of paid vacation per year, get paid when they are out of work, and get a 95% pension when they retire.  Their healthcare plans are much better than ours’ as well, since they don’t have to deal with military docs!  All that and they don’t even have to deal with deployments and the chance of getting killed or wounded in combat.  The Crawfish’s favorite retired Marine, GunnyG, has a pretty good breakdown of it here.  When that union is treated somewhat on par with the enlisted folks of the US military, then I’ll cut them some slack.  Until then, I say bust the unions!   

Of course, Queen Nanny “The Red” P-Lousy has stated that the real tool to fix this problem, Chapter 11 bankruptcy, is “not an option!”  That’s because bankruptcy would allow the companies to ditch the bloated UAW contracts currently in place.  We can’t have THAT, now! 

As demanded by some of the Critters, the Big 3 have spent the past 2 weeks coming up with their updated business plans to present to Congress.  It appears that the main part of the plan is to up their demands to $38 BILLION of OUR MONEY. 

The most recent polls show 61% of the public opposes the automakers bailout.  Chrysler’s Chairman, while ignoring the Chapter 11 option, says that without the bailout, Chrysler would fail and drive the US into a depression.  Nice scare tactics, but why don’t you do what it takes to make your company economically viable, so your 8 figure salary and bonuses can be somewhat justified. 

Somehow, I don’t think this counts as proper holiday spirit.  Bush Derangement Syndrome rages on… 

According to a Congresscritter, the ONLY qualification for replacing Dear Leader in the Senate (other than the replacement being a Democrat, of course) is that the replacement must be black, and possibly a woman.  Nice to see that his priorities are in order. 

Betcha didn’t know that there were a bunch of stoner dudes in ancient China!  That might explain why they eventually went to a socialist/communist system.  Nobody really wanted to work! 

Looks like the people behind the attacks in India have been identified, and they are based in (trumpet fanfare here) PAKISTAN!  Imagine my surprise.  Our supposed ally in the war on terrorism allows terrorist groups to hang out everywhere in their country.  An interesting note in the article is that US intelligence warned India about an attack from the sea.  UPDATE: SecState Rice says that the Pakis are vowing hunt down and round up anybody associated with the Mumbai attacks.  I’ll believe that when I see it. 

Maybe we should become allies with India instead.  They are smart enough to know that political correctness needs to be thrown out the window when dealing with terrorists.  They are not afraid to properly interrogate the only terrorist who lived through the Mumbai massacre. 

I’m sure y’all want another episode of “This ain’t quite the holiday spirit”, so here ya go!  This one doesn’t have anything to do with politics. 

At least this welfare queen is trying to look out for her kids.  Too bad she had so many of them with no real father to help take care of and provide for them.  Wonder if she ever figured out what causes babies to happen. 

Here we go again with another chapter of “Your Government At Work!”  The Visitors Center has finally opened at the Crapitol Building in DC.  The final price tag is $621 MILLION!  That’s only $550 million overbudget and three years behind schedule.  But it is okay, because now Senator Dingy Harry Reid doesn’t have to smell the tourists anymore.  He might have been on the verge of filing suit against the tourists, using the Americans With Disabilities Act like the person in this past Tuesday’s column. 

Looks like someone doesn’t want to be out of the spotlight.  Monica’s boyfriend says that he is open to be a sounding board for Hillary when she’s SecState, and he’d also accept other roles such as helping out with crisis situations like the one in India.  I seem to remember when ex-Presidents (besides Mr. Peanut) kept out of the limelight. 

Looks like an Alderman in St Louis understands that calling 9-1-1 is useless unless you manage to call 30 minutes BEFORE a crime happens.  He’s suggesting that the good citizens arm themselves.  If the criminals have already shown up, 9-1-1 is only used to let the CSI folks know that they’ll have a crime scene to process soon. 

Why in the Wide World of Sports can’t a company be allowed to employ only people who present a positive image to the public?  If you look like a scumbuzzard, no company should HAVE to keep you employed just because you belong to a drugged out religion. 

Want another story about what happens in cities that are run by liberals with a love of political correctness and class warfare?  Well, criminals get more rights than property owners.  Gotta love cities that pander to criminals. 

Y’all probably thought the notion of a holiday to honor The Chosen One had gone away.  I mean, what has he really accomplished, besides being 1/8 black, showing up for work in the Senate a whopping 143 days over 4 years, and hypnotizing the masses with his mantra of “Hope and Change…Hope and Change…Bush Sux…Hope and Change…”?  Well, fear not.  The hero worship and cult of personality has evidently worked in a small county in Alabama. 

The tolerant Hollyweird crowd is now making a musical to mock the supporters of Proposition 8.  Yep, it is perfectly okay to mock people who believe in religion but if anybody mocks the homosexuals, they are horrid bigots and should be shot. 

More proof that the entire nation of Great Britain is surrendering to Islam, including the Catholic Church, is found in this story.  Methinks that the Church leaders are missing the point of having CATHOLIC schools. 

The National Council of La Raza (“THE RACE”) is a racist organization that advocates for the return of most of California, Arizona, New Mexico, and parts of Texas to Mexico.  (well, their mission statement doesn’t say that anymore, but all of their people still call for Azatlan[sp?] to be returned at their rallys)  They also advocate for amnesty for all illegals here now and open borders in the future.  Why am I bringing up this bunch of racist pigs?  Well, The Chosen One has tapped one of La Raza’s vice presidents to be part of his staff.  Yep, Obama’s really a proud and loyal American.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw, e-mail them to me at at1aw_usn@yahoo.com and I’ll consider ‘em.  Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

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